How to use your relationships as a self development tool.

26.02.2026
All our external relationships mirror the most important relationship we've got, that being the relationship with ourselves (apart from our family relationships, because those usually form the relationship we've got with ourselves).
This is important to keep in mind, since many often feel like they're just "unlucky" when it comes to relationships, without realizing that they've got loads of control over what kind of people they attract, how people treat them in relationships, how they view them and or approach them etc.

It's all based on what kind of relationship we've got with ourselves, how we view ourselves, how we treat ourselves etc.

For example:

If we notice that others don't appreciate us, or if they tend to overlook what we do for them, then it's most likely because we tend to undervalue ourselves as well. 
If people keep oversteping our boundries, then it's most likely because we aren't setting them firmly enough. 
If people don't respect our needs, then it's most likely because we don't either. 

I would be able to go on and on with examples. But the main point that I'm trying to get accross is that our external relationships tend to mirror the relationship that we've got with ourselves.

This can be a hard realisation to have, especially if we don't like the relationships we are or have been a part of. But the positive side is, that once we realize this, we can take responsibility for it, with responcibility we take take control and with control we can change our circumstances. 


So once we realize that our external relationships often just reflect the relationship we've got with ourselves, and once we'll take responcibility for that, then we can start to use all the positive, as well as negative situations that have happend to us in our relationships as a self development / sef improvement tool.

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